My {Almost} Provincial Life

32 Weeks Pregnant

I am nearing the end of my pregnancy, I only have eight weeks left, give or take a week. This is a different time in a pregnant woman’s life. Reflection and realization take over. Things become calm. Tiredness returns, though not much can satisfy this need, as I am wildly uncomfortable. I had a bad pregnancy day yesterday. There was a peculiar cramping in my back and into my hips. I was actually feeling this for a few hours. During a part of that time, I was under the ultrasound at my doctor’s office. He didn’t say anything about it. I had been overextending my body lately, and knew that that was what the pain was in reference to.

Before We Moved In

After I Removed the Old Plants

My garden has been a place of genuine enjoyment lately. Sure all I have done is moved the unwanted, untended plants and branches from the trees and ground to bags and piles that now litter my yard. I am going to need a trailer to take things to the Green Waste Facility, though I don’t know what I am going to do with the branches. I fear the time I have to get at the overgrown ivy pulled up. I am, however, looking forward to going to the nursery and picking out my vegetables for the season. As much as I can, I am going to try to operate a real kitchen garden.

Enjoying My Sewing Materials

I am almost done with the new baby’s quilt. It is actually so much more work than I could ever have anticipated. It is relaxing and therapeutic, but a lot of work. I keep thinking that I am going to finish it when I begin working on it for the day, and get no where close to it. Mae loves to help with it. She insists on climbing up a chair next to me and touching, grabbing, handing, and messing with everything I am currently working on. I used to let her sit on my lap, but a while ago, she reached out to the needle as it was in motion, so that was the end of that. I need to make the new baby’s bedding as well, but I have a fear that I won’t be able to get to it before she is born.

Mae loves the outdoors. We can hardly go a day without a walk, picnic, or just soaking up the sun. The part of my yard with the greenhouse and orchard is fenced off, so when I work back there, I just need to put the dog and the babe in there, and close the gate. It is monumentally convenient  Except while I was in the thick of it, I didn’t realize that Mae was curious as to what dirt tasted like. Unfortunately, I think she liked it. We will see how I tackle that fun new behavior.

I really love where I live. It makes staying at home all day enjoyable. This home was designed for a stay-at-home mother. My old house was designed for… to be sold. I had a nightmare about the people who bought our house; It weighs on my conscience to have loaded the home onto someone else. I really grew to dislike the architecture and design of my old home. It felt fake at the end. It felt like a poorly planned rectangle built with fake materials, made with a facade that was only meant to project a message that there was a house behind it, as though they couldn’t just make a house. I remember crying about it. I remember when Mae fell down the stairs in the split-entry design, and I could have just died right there. That was the moment that really projected me to sell. I could deal with its flaws for the most part, but not at the expense of my child. The yard was unusable, despite four springs I poured all my time, money, and energy to transform into a real yard. The land is unusable, the design is thoughtless, and the materials used to build it were all ideas of real materials fudged to work just OK. It isn’t a place to raise children. Where I live now is a place to raise a family. It is place to feel God in the earth, love in the home, and grow like the human beings were always meant to grow.

Spring is here, and I am happy everyday to live where I live.

It’s Rude to Talk About Religion

I watched Big Fish the other day with baby Mae and the husband. He told a story (kind of the theme of the movie) of birds in the Congo that talk to each other about everything, except religion, because it is rude to talk about religion. It made me chuckle, because it is quite true.

Despite this, I wanted to post about my first day at my new ward in my new neighborhood. Firstly, it was daylight savings time, so the clocks went an hour ahead. However, I don’t think Mae noticed one bit. She must be on a clock schedule, not an internal clock schedule, because right at 11, she went down for a nap, and right at 5 she had dinner, and right at 7, she went to bed for night. She did all this despite the fact that the day before it would have made it nap at 10, dinner at 4, and bedtime at 6. She is amazing. And actually this whole post is mostly about how much she amazes me.

So we woke her up from her nap, I dressed her up, packed her a lunch, and headed out to the new ward. We moved just a few houses down from this beautiful, old church house, and I was delighted to walk to church, but I guess it is being remodeled so we had to drive about ten minutes up the road to a old (in a bad way) building. The building is very odd, and is a split level upon entering. It took a bit of navigating to discover where the chapel was. It was packed to the overflow in the gym. I really didn’t want to battle with a one-year old for an hour sitting on metal folding chairs in a gym, but there was not an empty seat in the house. Much to my happiness, we discovered that it was a farewell for a sister missionary, so she had overfilled the chapel with her friends and family – so it isn’t the norm. Mae was pretty ok for the first half hour. She sat on our laps and ate her snack-like lunch. I was being kind of silly, and packed strawberries and applesauce. She started to eat one strawberry and the juice ran all over her dress. Her lunch was reduced to whole wheat Ritz crackers, dried apricots, and apple juice. I felt way bad. Well, once lunch was done, she was done as well. It just isn’t natural for a little ball of firecracker energy to stay on her parent’s laps for an hour and ten minutes without protest. We gave her books, toys, and other distractions. I let her stand on a folding chair next to me and observe the kids behind us coloring. It was a battle the whole time. It is like trying to get a full grown dolphin to sit in our laps for an hour. This is why we hadn’t been going to church ever since Mae matured past sleepy baby faze. The next two hours of church looked grim for our enjoyment, Sunday school and Relief Society (Adam goes to Priesthood).

We met the bishop who is a jovial, nice man. We gave them our info to transfer our records from our ward in Roy to this one. I sat next to some people in Sunday school that were very nice. The man answered every question asked of the class, with sincerity and conviction, and I love when people interact during class. His wife, which of course I cannot remember their names, told me that they have a 13 year gap between their youngest and next youngest child (they have five children). I thought that was pretty cool. Well, Adam was out in the hall trying to let Mae run around and get the crazy out. He came in about ten minutes into class. That lasted about two minutes. Mae was bananas. She was out of her mind. I just kept thinking that this was ridiculous and that there could possibly be no kid that can sit through three hours of church like this. Now, there is nursery, but it is only for 18 month to 3 year olds. Mae is barely 15 months old. Adam took her back to the hall to run around like a mad woman.

He sent me a text, “She turned up the crazy.”

Then a few minutes later, after I had to come to the sad realization that we would need to become inactive Mormons for the next few months, he sent me, “We are in nursery.”

Apparently, they were in the hallway and heard the little kids singing, so Adam just took her in there. There were six kids and four leaders. They handed her a maraca, which Mae took and played right along, and when they asked for all the instruments back she went and put it back in the basket. They arranged little chairs and had a lesson, and Mae sat in her little chair and listened to the whole lesson. During coloring time, she opted to play with the toy collection. Adam told the sister in charge that Mae was only 15 months, but she didn’t care, thankfully. Some children find the whole experience traumatizing at first, especially the parent leaving to go to his or her own class, but Adam needed to go to the restroom and visit his class, so he asked if it’d be alright if he left her, they said that would be fine, and he left, without so much as a care from the little lady. The leaders were so wonderful. They said that it would be alright to take her in there next week as well. Adam commented later to me that she might be mature enough (except that she does put most of the toys in her mouth). The biggest sigh of relief came over me. It was like Mae should have always been allowed to go in there.

When I came to get her, Adam was helping put away chairs in the overflow, she didn’t even care that I was there, she didn’t even miss me. I told her to put away her toys, which she did. The sister there said that she did wonderfully.

Mae impresses me so much. I was a leader in nursery for over a year in my last ward, so I am quite familiar with it. Most kids have a very hard time adjusting to it and it takes a few months until they can handle it. Some kids are too small or too young to fully experience the activities and schedule until they are over two years old. When we would have parents bring in underage kids for the day, they would stick out like sore thumbs, and often get trampled on. They usually couldn’t interact with the other kids successfully or participate in any of the organized activities, let alone the lesson. Well, to be honest, most kids can’t handle the lesson the entire time they are in there anyway (and probably not even in the next primary class) as is the nature of sitting still as a child. But there she was, like an old pro, jumping right in like it was made for her.

She was so hungry when we got home just after 4:00pm, so I am very glad I had put a pork roast in the oven before we left. I was only slightly afraid that our 60 year old oven shouldn’t be left alone, even on a low temp, so I may have to pull out the crock pot for other Sundays. I am just not the biggest fan of the crock pot.

Besides the fact I didn’t make any friends or really got to meet anyone, nor listen to the talks in sacrament meeting, it was a nice time at church, and I now feel like we can go a second time. Woohoo!

Brie, Blackberry, and Honey Grilled Sandwich

I had seen brie sandwiches on Pinterest way too much lately, it was getting to me. Well, we moved last weekend, and the food that made it from one house to the next was a small amount, but it was all quality things, things I wouldn’t feel comfortable tossing. Finding time to explore a new grocery store in my new area seemed like the last thing I wanted to do, so we had a lot of rich ingredient meals lately. The other night we had halibut steaks with Gorgonzola arugula salad. Today, was no exception. When Mae awoke from her nap, I began to get together lunch. I made her a peanut butter sandwich with strawberries, then started my sandwich. This was the set up:

 

I was so excited. It smelled amazing. I buttered the bread, laid the cheese, immiserated the blackberries a bit then layered them, and last I drizzled honey before placing the other piece of bread. The picture I took of it when it was completed is pretty mediocre. I apologize. I was just excited to eat it.

 

It tasted amazing. Well, I got a few bites in and noticed the babe eyeing it over her peanut butter and strawberries, so I gave her a bite. She made a loud, audible yummy noise, then she persisted for more and more. With every bite came another overly exaggerated yummy noise. I only got a new more bites in before she just took it from my hands. I would have made her one also, but she usually ignores blackberries on her plate, and brie is a really stinky cheese. Serves me right for assuming, huh?

Beside the fact I barely got any, it was a great combination, as made evident by my 15 month old daughter.

 

Dear Baby Inside Me

I wrote this letter to my daughter on October 13, 2012. I wanted to share it now, as it is even more true than ever. I made bold my favorite part. 

Dear baby inside me,

I wanted you to know, before time makes the details indiscernible, what I want for you. I know it, just as you know it, that you wanted to come to earth as soon as your sister was born. I felt it. Like heaven itself opened up and allowed me to hear your cries to gain a body and join us. At times, I feel that it was too soon, though. I become worried that Mae won’t get that alone time or that our relationship might suffer. I become worried that having two kids under two will be overwhelming and promote an atmosphere of stress. But then I look at your beautiful sister, and I can  see a future where she is more happy than ever to have a sibling in just seven short months. When we were at the WIC office the other day, Mae was overcome with the desire to be near this little three-week old boy. She nearly became irate when I made her stay on my lap. When given the chance she bolted from my arms and aggressively grabbed at the car seat carrier the boy was in to get her face right up next his face. And smiled right at him. She laughed and looked up at me and made this hard breathing laugh noise she makes when she is so happy. I know she is too young to understand when I tell her that she will have one of those soon, but if she were to understand I know she would be happy about the news.

Baby, I want this home to be one where you thrive. I want you to know what it is like to have a sibling that you love, respect, and admire, and that you feel all that in return from her. I want the two of you to grow up hand in hand. Mae is an amazing person to know, and I would have been so happy if she was my sister.

I am nine weeks pregnant with you right now. We expect you in May. In the meantime I will continue to prepare for your arrival.

Your mother, Danielle.

Those First Few Weeks

Since I am about eleven weeks away from the new baby’s arrival, I guess it is about time I plan for it. Smart, huh? I have been trying to remember all the things I needed in those first weeks that I needed with Mae. I am trying to remember what became an emergency and what I asked my mom to drive all the way to do for me. Of course this time will be different because it will, in fact, be my second time, however, I will also have another child. I can’t anticipate everything, but I can certainly attempt to be prepared!

Firstly, let us start with the new baby’s needs:

The New Baby’s Needs

• Food
  • Breast milk from the mama
  • An excessive amount of burp cloths all ready to go
• Sleep
  • Wrap for the mama to wear her (done!)
  • Moses basket with new stand
  • Swaddling cloths and blankets
  • The rest of the time she will sleep in my arms or next to me in bed
• Clothes
  • Mae was born in November, so she has a wide array of warm onesies, pants, and sleepers
  • Will be purchasing a new take home outfit for fun
  • I remember Mae ran out of pants, so I may buy a few more
• Diaper Station
  • Enough newborn diapers for ten a day, for at least three weeks, unopened in case they irritate or she grows out of them
  • Rash cream in case her diapers irritate her
  • Enough wipes for a small army
• Binky choices
  • Just in case she wants one, takes one, and is in need of one

Now, the mama’s needs

• Food
  • Full strength juices (cranberry, grapefruit, orange, grape, etc)
  • Nighttime snack choices; a ham in the fridge with rolls for quick sandwiches
  • Cheese snacks
  • Make a giant salad for the fridge for quick eats
  • Lucky Slice Pizza on speed dial
  • Have my mom do a giant grocery trip while I am in the hospital
• Sleep
  • Have a large library of movies and TV shows all ready for the long late nights and nursing sessions
  • Have both washable and disposable nursing pads for late night leaks
  • Purchase new pillow (it is just a good time for this)
• Clothes
  • A new nursing bra (Alright, I’ll be honest, I never did own one with Mae. It was a front clasp one, but I will get a real one this time)
  • Plenty of shirts that allow easy access
• Health
  • Make sure the hospital sends me home with an excessive supply of those mesh panties and elephant ear pads
  • Have super pads, about five packages
  • Make time for a daily shower
  • Ibuprofen like mad
  • Have hair trimmed and taken care of a few weeks before due date

Life is going to be crazy, but maybe anticipating some issues before hand will help out. As for Mae, we are picking out a hospital present for her to get along side a new sister. She will be staying at the hospital as much as she can with me, and when it becomes necessary, she will stay with my parents. I need to actually have snacks in the house for her, in case making lunches and such becomes difficult, and Adam would appreciate too I am sure. And, Mae is getting a toddler bed this weekend. We will see how that goes. Fingers crossed.

I am extremely excited, but if the first few weeks are anything like they were with Mae, then I am in for it. It was one of the hardest times of my life, but I wouldn’t have it any other way.

How Does Your Garden Grow?

This last year I was extremely motivated to start a genuine garden. Even with my brown thumb, even with my poor watering, even with the drought summer – I still produced quite a bit and was able to enjoy the fruits of my labor. Well, we are moving, and leaving my garden boxes and peach tree to be tended by someone new. For some reason, the universe decided that I needed another chance to revive my brown thumb into maybe a shade of green, because the house we are moving into next week is fully equipped with a small orchard and a greenhouse. Because of the snow, and the fact that I didn’t bring my snow shoes and excavating equipment, I only saw a photo from Google Earth of what was happening back there. It has been warming up lately, so when we stopped by the place to shovel out the driveway for our move this week, I trekked back there, and boy was I surprised.

It was like walking to the secret garden.

I walked through an archway in the fence that is intertwined with grape vines. Upon entering the orchard I found three fruit trees in serious need of a heavy handed pruning: two apple trees and a pear tree. To my right, is the greenhouse. There are six grow boxes filled with untended plants from the fall. The boxes are all set up for irrigation and an in-ground sprinkler system. The back of the greenhouse is heavy with a wall of ivy. The cabbage could have been harvested not too long ago if someone was living there. It is like a little spot of heaven. I am both intimidated and inspired. My baby is due in May, and May is the biggest time of the year for a place like this. I hope I can tend it sufficiently. It is too beautiful to not.